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Grace Before Meals: What are Your Food Rules?

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First of all,  Happy Feast of the Assumption!   What a great mid-summer feast.  I have very specific childhood memories of being on vacation with our family at Wildwood, NJ, and the priest blessing the ocean waves on this day.  I always want to be at the beach on this day, but it rarely happens.  Maybe next year?


This spring, as I was preparing to take on this role of book page editor and blogger for the Catholic Post, I had a number of discussions with my editor Tom Dermody, about future books to feature.


I had just finished Michael Pollan’s slim but very intriguing book, Food Rules, and I suggested this one as a possible one for a summer month.  Fortunately, Tom pointed out the challenge of a month-long discussion on this one book, and he’s right.   That’s why he’s the editor, and I’m the editee.  Thank you, Tom.

Food Rules is a compendium of different rules people shared with food writer Pollan about how they eat healthy.  Most of them are great basic advice for eating well, though some are very appealing to me personally. Sweets only on days that begin with an S? I don’t think so, Mr. Pollan!

But the book an interesting starting point for talking about food rules–we all have them, and defining them can be a fun exercise.

Here are some of my food rules:

Almost always, I eat the same thing for breakfast and lunch every single day, and I don’t mind a bit.   This one I learned from my Dad, who didn’t mind it, either.

This one, also from my Dad:  there is no such thing as too much fiber.

Coffee can make you feel better.  This one was from my Mom, and I only learned this later in life and not in time to thank her.

Dark chocolate makes you smarter (even on days that don’t start with an S).

I wish I had some good food rules for children, but for now I just keep putting out whatever good stuff I can and hope some of it sticks at some point, either literally or figuratively.

What are your top food rules?

Grace Before Meals: Family Meal Rules?

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Fr. Leo’s ministry Grace Before Meals is all about gathering families around the dinner table for good food and good conversation, in order to foster the great connections that the domestic Church that is the family.

But I had an interesting discussion some weeks back with a group of moms about if the “family dinner” was so important.  One mom argued that other mealtimes, like breakfast, could be a time to gather, and pegging it to dinner was too restrictive.   Another mom argued that perhaps even mealtime was not necessary for connection when there are other opportunities for connection as a family, and that “forcing” everyone to participate in family mealtimes could be counterproductive.   It made for an interesting conversation.

I do think there is something important about eating together that is unique in a family’s experience.    But I also know some people don’t have great memories of family mealtimes.  Also, there can be different seasons of life, such as busy sport or work schedules and young children just learning table manners, that can make family mealtimes a challenge at best.

As I wrote in my review of Fr. Leo’s book, our family’s mealtimes often break some of the common “rules” for dinner time.  I was partially joking, of course, because there are no rules in Canon Law for how mealtimes should look.

But we do try to make an effort to have family mealtimes and interesting conversations to go along with those, and I find that as our children get older both the discussions and the food get more interesting.  That keeps us committed to trying to make those times a priority, even as schedules get busier.

What are some of your family meal rules?  Any suggestions for

Grace Before Meals: Your Favorite Cookbook, Food Magazine, Blog or Recipe Website?

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Care to share your favorite website, cooking magazine, blog or cookbook to help you cook at home?

I tend to “google” a recipe if I’m looking for, say, a recipe for something in particular, like soba noodles in peanut sauce.

But the sites I tend to trust for accurate, turns out most of the time, recipes is Epicurious.   I enjoy getting recipes off of various people’s blogs, but I find the recipes frequently don’t come out as good as the photo!

Cookbooks?  I have two versions of the Joy of Cooking, one my mom got me when I lived in my first apartment in the 1980s.  When a new edition came out in 1997, she gave me that one as well; for some reason, even though I purge cookbooks from time to time, I still keep them both on the shelf.    They are both such a wealth of information about all kinds of cooking and food, and a good base to learn about basic techniques and cooking methods.  Armed with the information

I love cooking magazines, and I used to have a tradition a friend recommended of subscribing to one cooking magazine per year and then rotating; so I did “Cooking Light” one year, Cook’s Illustrated the next, and so on.  But though I love to page through them, I found that they piled up alarmingly, so  I don’t subscribe to any at the moment.   The one cooking magazine I did frequently try recipes from was Cook’s Illustrated, and they tended to be pretty great recipes.

What are your favorites?

Grace Before Meals Question: Favorite Faith-Based Food Traditions?

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One of the best things about Fr. Leo’s book Grace Before Meals is how it is divided by different seasons, from religious holidays (the Feast of the Sacred Heart) to sports team gatherings.  The recipes and “Let’s Talk.. Let’s Listen” portion of each relate to the  of each of these times through the year.  He suggests great ideas to help 


One recent one I can recall is from July 16– we try to have something with caramel on the feast of Our Lady of Carmel.  I know, it’s not “Our Lady of Caramel,” but it does help us to remember Our Lady that day in a “sweet” way.


Since we are Italian at our house, we’ve got lots of food-based traditions that relate to the liturgical year.  My husband makes his family’s Sicilian savoiardi (ladyfingers) recipe on St. Joseph’s Day, and we serve both fish and pizza on Christmas Eve.  (I’m not sure why the pizza, except that traditionally Christmas Eve was a day of abstinence from meat; both my family and my husband’s family had this tradition).


What are some of your favorite faith-based food traditions?

Meet a Reader: Sylvia Standaert

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Here’s August’s “Meet a Reader,”  the monthly feature that also appears on the Book Page of the Catholic Post.
If you have a suggestion of someone that would be a good subject for a future “Meet a Reader” column, please leave a comment!
Who:  Sylvia Standaert, librarian, Our Lady of Grace Academy (formerly St. Anne School), East Moline
I was born with Cerebral Palsy but because of my parents’ dedication and my determination and tenacity, it has never deterred me from reaching my goals.  I have worked in a Pre-school-8th grade school library (Our Lady of Grace Catholic Academy formerly St. Anne School) for 43 years.  The kids keep me going.  I have two older brothers, Gene and Jim, and enjoy their children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren.  My hobbies include collecting Longaberger baskets, reading, shopping and travel.  I have visited 46 states and 14 countries.
Why do you love reading?
I have read voraciously since the first day I could read.  It might have stemmed from the fact that it was something I could do despite my handicap, but I can’t imagine being without a book.  Books can take you anyplace you want to go, and make you feel like you are part of the characters’ lives.   Books can teach you anything you want to learn about any subject imaginable.
What is your favorite book? 
My favorite book is The Bears Visit the Library, a book I wrote and my niece/godchild Michele illustrated. (Michele is an artist in Arizona).  The Bears Visit the Library is based on a program I do each year with the kindergarten class at our school.  When we started the kindergarten at the school, I thought using my extensive collection of teddy bears could be a great way to relay the importance of reading and using the library to a group of very inquisitive five-year-olds.   I usually start my bear curriculum in January, about the time the kindergarten teacher is doing something with polar bears.   As the school year progresses, brown bears appear, as do holiday, gardening and sports bears.
What are you currently reading? Mysteries are my favorite genre.   I just finished a Charlotte LaRue Mystery “Death Tidies Up by Barbara Coley.  Charlotte has a maid service and keeps finding dead bodies in unusual places.  I love the Abby and Ophelia mystery series by Shirley Damsgaard, including the latest in the series, “The Seventh Witch.”  Ophelia is a small town librarian, and she and her grandmother Abby have some very “magickal” powers.   Other favorite authors include Joanne Fluke, Mary Higgins Clark, Nicholas Sparks, Nora Roberts and John Grisham.

Grace Before Meals Offers Healthy Servings of Ideas & Recipes for Family Mealtimes

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Father Leo Patalinghug,well-known cooking priest, who defeated Bobby Flay on the Food Network’s “Throwdown,” has a new version of his book, Grace Before Meals,  as part of his ministry (www.gracebeforemeals.com) to strengthen family relationships around the dinner table.
So let me start by saying, bless us, Father Leo, for our family has sinned:
Sometimes, we eat fast food in the minvan.
Sometimes, we don’t eat together. 
Sometimes we eat in front of the television (but it’s always an educational show, I promise you—“ The Next Food Network Star” and “Gilligan’s Island” count as educational shows, right?).
Some of us eat pie for breakfast, when there’s pie around.
Some of the younger of us don’t like to stay seated.
I’m sure we’re not the only family to break the rules of what constitutes a “good dinner” or a “good meal.”   That’s why Grace Before Meals is such a great resource.
Grace Before Meals is not a “rule book,” but encouragement and some great tools to challenge families to gather around the table and create special traditions regarding mealtime.   Themed chapters focus on traditions and recipes for different times, from the common (New Year’s Day, Mother’s Day), to the not-so-common (sports teams, the Feast of the Sacred Heart).
Many things make this book worthwhile to have on your cookbook shelf, but two features stand out:
*First, the recipes.  While some are not exactly health-conscious, they are largely made with wholesome natural ingredients.  Available in the new version of Fr. Leo’s book is the secret recipe for his “fusion fajitas” with which Father Leo beat Bobby Flay on “Throwdown.”  My only “beef”  (pun intended) is that there are not photos of the finished dishes, something I love in cookbooks.
*Second, the “Let’s Talk…Let’s Listen” section at the end of each chapter.  The questions are great conversation starters, and “Let’s Listen” provide some scripture verses to look up and share regarding the topic.
For instance, in the Father’s Day meal section, questions include, “Do you think it’s harder to be a mom or a dad? Why? “ and “Which television fathers are the most realistic?”
Recently, I was part of a conversation with a group of moms about whether the old-fashioned “family dinner” is required for connected, happy family life.   Why not other mealtimes, like breakfast, or other activities, like game nights or excursions, to build closeness?
G.K. Chesterton, a man who clearly loved meals, pointed out, that meals are sacred, but so is all of life:
“You say grace before meals.  All right.  But I say grace before the play and before the opera, and grace before the concert and the pantomime, and grace before I open a book, and grace before sketching, painting, swimming, fencing, boxing, walking, playing, dancing; and grace before I dip the pen in the ink.”
As Chesterton says, it’s not an either/or.  Family connections can be built around any sort of activity, though there’s something unique about cooking and mealtimes that foster connection and conversation. 
The cooking and the mealtimes are going to look different in every family, and Grace Before Meals reminds us to make those family connections and conversation a priority.