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Q&A With Marge Fenelon, author of "Strengthening Your Family"

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I’m delighted to have had the chance to “e-chat” with Marge Fenelon, author of Strengthening Your Family, one of the books I reviewed in my January column.   Marge, my thanks for being willing and thorough in answering my questions here. 


 Q: Tell Catholic Post Book Group blog readers a little about yourself, your family and your writing.

I’m a cradle Catholic and have been married to my husband, Mark, for 29 years. We have four mostly-grown children, ages 26-16, and live in the Midwest. My interest in writing began in grade school, although for a time I was convinced that I’d become a criminal lawyer so I could go after the Mafia (Go ahead, laugh. I do.). I majored in Journalism in college and spent several years as a public relations consultant. One day, I woke up and said to myself, “I want to write for the Church.” So, from that moment on, I wrote almost exclusively for Catholic publications and organizations. I couldn’t be happier.

 Q.  As I wrote in my review of your book, I felt like we are “kindred spirits… I felt like I was having lunch with a friend and getting encouraging counsel and spiritual uplift about family life and its inevitable ups and downs.”  Was your conversational, fellow-traveler style intentional, and how did this help you?

I think my writing style involved from my copious journaling throughout grade school, high school, and college. The “copious” part tapered off once I had kids; the desire was there, but the time wasn’t. I always addressed my journal entries to someone – the Blessed Mother, Our Lord, or a favorite saint. It helped to picture someone on the other end of the line, so to speak. Once I started getting published, folks seemed to like my style, so I kept up with it. Once, my spiritual director called me a natural storyteller, and so I took that as a sign from God that I should try to further develop that gift. Mostly, though, I think it comes from the fact that I love and enjoy people – all kinds of them!

Q.  Before I read your book, I was not at all familiar with the Schoenstatt Apostolic Movement.  Is it primarily regional to WI, where you live?  Can you tell us a little more about it and its influence on your family’s life?

Schoenstatt is an international lay movement founded in 1914 in Schoenstatt, Germany, by Father Joseph Kentenich (1885-1968), a German priest whose cause for beatification has been opened in Rome. Father Kentenich spent 14 years in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, and the movement sprouted roots there. That’s how I encountered it – through a chance meeting of my mother with Fr. Kentenich and my attendance at a Catholic grade school taught by the Schoenstatt Sisters of Mary.


The Movement is one of moral and religious renewal, based on a Covenant of Love with Mary under the title Mother Thrice Admirable and with the Schoenstatt Marian Shrine as a focus and place of grace. There are more than 250 Schoenstatt Shrines throughout the world and on every continent. People also erect home shrines, or prayer corners, in their homes in the same spirit.


Cornerstones of the Schoenstatt method of education include ideals, freedom, and self-education, which have become cornerstones for my educational methods for myself and my children. Schoenstatt has given us a framework in which to grow spiritually and has drawn us closer to Mary and her Son.


Q.   Your kids are mostly grown now.  How does this phase of life change your parenting and your spirituality?


Whew. Great question! I often think that parenting now is far more time consuming (in a good way) than when the kids were little. There are days I throw up my hands and jokingly exclaim, “Argh! What I wouldn’t give for a poopy diaper!” Basically, as the kids get bigger, so do the problems. And yet, it’s a privilege and delight to see them become the persons God has intended them to be, and to hear their impressions of the world unfolding around them. Frequently, they’ll spontaneously seek me out for a heart-to-heart chat, and I love that! I do more listening and taking in now, as opposed to active teaching. Once in a while I’ll give advice, but I try to allow them the freedom and encouragement to work things out on their own. That can be excruciating when I see one of my children going through a tough time! Spiritually, I have (a little) more time to myself, but my focus still usually is on my children. I pray for them, but also I offer for them – sacrifices and acts of self-mortification. Don’t worry; no leather whips with little iron balls at the end! I may fast for a day, give up something I really like, make a pilgrimage to the Marian Shrine, or do some extra work around the house – things like that. On a personal level, I’ve discovered that now I have the ability to dig deeper in order to root out those evasive chunks of nastiness in the crevices of my soul that had eluded me when I was occupied with those aforementioned diapers.

Q.  What do most hope readers will take away from Strengthening Your Family?

Uh, the whole book? Kidding aside, I hope that they can grasp what I see to be the five most important elements of parenting toward sanctity: holiness, stewardship, apostleship, freedom, and joy. I’d also like to see some of the sting taken out of that word, holiness. It’s not just for canonized saints, or for the family that sits in the front pew at Sunday Mass. It’s for US – for you, me, your family, my family – with all our blemishes and shortcomings. We’re all called to holiness regardless of our state of life or step in the spiritual journey. Additionally, holiness is obtainable in small, concerted increments. It’ll cost us much sweat, prayer, and sacrifice, but it’s definitely do-able.

Q. What writing projects or books are in your future?  

I’m always working on something…sometimes too many somethings at once. I plan to continue writing my columns and to broaden the base of sites and publications that host my work. I’m doing some re-structuring of my website and forging a new blog, called “Are we there yet?” which will be about the ups and downs of traveling toward the Kingdom together as family – nuclear, extended, community, parish, Church and society. Book-wise, I’m working on an exciting new one (with a likely sister-book) for which I can’t yet give detail because the contract hasn’t been finalized. However, I can tell you that both our Blessed Mother and moms of all kinds will be VERY excited about it!

Time to Go on a (Media) Diet?

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Here is my January column that appears in this weekend’s Catholic Post.  I invite your feedback here or on Facebook or Twitter.
So, you’re already re-considering your New Year’s Resolution by this time.  Maybe those resolutions to get your kitchen or finances organized, or to exercise every day, have been abandoned already.
Can I suggest watching your diet?
No, I don’t mean what you eat, but the media you consume—your “media diet.”  I once wrote a column for The Catholic Post called, “You Are What You Read” about making good media choices because it’s a lot like eating well.  The more you fill up on the good stuff, the less bad stuff you have time for, or even have a taste for.   And by “good stuff” in books, I don’t mean brussel sprouts, but dark chocolate that’s delicious and healthy.
Here are a few good choices for people looking to fill up on some great and nourishing reads.  As a bonus, all have topics that might help you keep some of those resolutions.
Hoping to do more as a family?  Two books provide help:
Strengthening Your Family: A Catholic Approach to Holiness by Marge Fenelon.  I’ve never met Marge Fenelon, but we are kindred spirits.  Reading each chapter of this excellent book, I felt like I was having lunch with a friend and getting encouraging counsel and spiritual uplift about family life and its inevitable ups and downs.  Fenelon is not writing from the perspective of a holier-than-thou, but rather a fellow traveler who’s been there, made the mistakes, and yet still calls us (and herself) to a Catholic vision of doing family life well.  She shows us having a strong, holy family is hard, but also fun and rewarding, work.
Media mindfulness—viewing media in light of our Catholic faith– is a perennial interest of mine, and a frequent topic at our house.  And no one does “media mindfulness and literacy better than the Daughters of St. Paul.    Our fridge displays a Daughter of St. Paul magnet: “Control is for the moment—communication lasts a lifetime.” 
In this spirit, Daughter of St. Paul Hosea Rupprecht wrote How to Watch Movies with Kids:  A Values-Based Strategy to give tons of great ideas for parents, teachers and others who care about media literacy and mindfulness.  I so appreciated how each chapter ends; with “Saints to Guide Us” (for instance, St. Edith Stein on a chapter called, “Values Articulation,”) and with questions for family conversations. 
Thinking about living a healthier lifestyle?  Make sure you have balance in this area.
Weightless: Making Peace With Your Body, Kate Wicker’s heartfelt, personal book about body image and the spiritual life, is a resource especially well-suited to younger women.
Wicker leads readers through her own journey of an eating disorder and treatment, and now as a wife and mother yearning to hand on healthy body image to her young daughters.  She explores the role of having balance in all things related to our bodies, taking advantage of medical and psychological help when needed, but most of all keeping God at the center.  I love that that Wicker recommends (as do many resources) a “media fast” from unhealthy sources, and doing the same with her kids.  Throughout, Wicker tells readers, “If you love God, then love your body.”  Amen.
*Extreme Makeover: Women Transformed by Christ, Not Conformed by the Culture by Teresa Tomeo. Tomeo, a Catholic radio host, writes persuasively about how damaging a constant and solely secular media diet can be.
Best by far is the chapter titled,” Extreme Media Makeover: Your Personal Media Reality Check and Spiritual Beauty Plan,” in which she encourages an inventory of one’s media consumption, and more of the sacramental life.  Tomeo is great at reminding us that silence (or fasting) is a critical aspect of a healthy media life:  “We have to silence the noise in our lives if we want to hear from God an live a more peaceful and less stressful life.”
Have you resolved to make work-life balance a priority this year?  Consider The Catholic Briefcase: Tools for Integrating Faith and Work by Randy Hain.
At first glance, The Catholic Briefcase seems like book written only for business executives, but it reaches to such a wide range of people I’d recommend it for just about adult who works, inside or outside the home—pretty much everyone.   Hain is not only a business leader, but a recent convert, and he helps remind us cradle Catholics the richness of our faith, and the tools we all have available to keep us effective and holy in our vocation.
Each chapter offers interviews, encouragement and ideas not just for making realistic faith part of work life, but infusing an attractive Catholic culture into everything we do.   Especially helpful is advice on Catholic business networking, and making the spiritual life a priority.

Q & A with Local Author Deacon Bruce Bradford

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Following is my brief interview with local author Deacon Bruce Bradford, author of An Angel Named Herald, one of the books I reviewed in my December column about Christmas gift books.  Thanks so much, Deacon Bradford, for sharing about your book and your life here!





Q: Tell Catholic Post Book Group blog readers a little about yourself and your family.

I’ve been married 47 years to my wife Terry, and we have four children and 10 grandchildren. Both Terry and I were born and raised in the state of Maine. I worked for Pan American Airways for 25 years( and so I can say that the TV series is not all that accurate.). We lived in New York City; Shaker Heights Ohio; and then 38 years in Oak Park, just outside Chicago.  In 2006 we retired to Pekin to be closer to our daughters and five of our ten grandchildren. I was ordained as a permanent Deacon 26 years ago in Chicago. At present I am assigned to two parishes; St Joseph in Hopedale & St Mary in Delavan. I am an amateur actor (20 years) and am presently in a production of A Christmas Carol. This fall, I performed in “The Ghosts of Spoon River.”

I also volunteer driving seniors for the Miller Senior Center, and conduct a “Bible Connections” session for the mentally and physically challenged at PARC in North Peoria. I am constantly reading and enjoy travelling around the country with Terry to visit our boys in Houston and Minneapolis.  Isn’t retirement grand?

Q:  How did you come up with the idea for the book?

Six years ago I decided that as Deacon of the Mass I wanted to read something after the Gospel of Luke on Christmas Eve for the children.  I created Herald to be used as someone we could emulate as a messenger for God’s message of love. The response that first Christmas eve was “Where can we buy the book?” I of course had to say that Herald was in my head only.  People urged me to publish which I respectively laughed off.

When I moved to Pekin and was assigned to the two parishes mentioned I read the story to the children and again was asked about a book. A parishioner overheard my discussion. She walked up to me and said,”Publish it, and I want the first copy.”  Eight months later she had her copy.

Q. You mentioned that the book was initially intended for your grandchildren.  What made you want to publish it to a wider audience?

I asked myself why publish “Herald”?  I determined that if I published it would be for my ten grandchildren.  I wanted them to have something of their grandfather’s creation. The original orders for books reflected that desire. Then I decided to get additional copies for the children on Christmas Eve and my friends at Parc. I started getting requests from friends for the book and suggestions that I do a book signing.  I’ve had one in Oak Park, one at Lagron-Miller in Peoria, and on December 20th I’ll be doing another book signing at “I Know You Like a Book” bookstore in Peoria Heights.  The book has been a blessing, and has reunited me with so many folks around the country.

Q.  What do you hope readers take away from “An Angel Named Herald”?

Herald’s story is our story.  Jesus came to create a “new” kingdom; a kingdom based on Love and action.  We like Herald, have doubts that we are up to the task, but God like he did with Herald provides us with the tools to be his Herald.  We, like Herald, are called to be God’s messengers.

Q. Is there anything else you would like to add, or wish I would have asked?

People have asked if there will be a sequel. My answer to that is Herald in our lives is a daily sequel.

Great Christmas Gift Books for "Almost" Everyone

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Every great book is not for every person.    Accepting that reality has been a journey.
I used to think that some books absolutely everyone mustread, and then they would love and cherish them as much as I did.  This view was shaken some years back when I proposed to our little parish book group that we read Thornton Wilder’s The Bridge of San Luis Rey.   I was shocked that every member but me so disliked reading (much less discussing) this classic.
And then there was the time last year I solemnly promised to Sue, a Catholic workout buddy, that she would love The Loser Letters, but she must read and love The Screwtape Letters first.  And she really, really didn’t like either one.  Sorry, Sue!
Those books are classic and deservedly loved by millions.  And they would make great Christmas gift books . … . for me.  But, as I now admit freely, notfor everyone. 
With those stories (and many others, trust me) in mind, putting together my annual list of Christmas-worthy gift books became daunting.  I receive tons of great Catholic books, and learn about many others.  How to recommend ones that would be of interest to the wide range of Catholic Post readers? 
This year, I chose not just books I personally love, but well-written, nicely “done” books that may be outside my comfort zone but that others would love and enjoy.  I sought out online friends, church acquaintances, and even perfect strangers in trying to find out what makes a great gift book.  And as always, I encourage you to seek out your local Catholic bookseller and explore the great options out there. 
Fiction for adults:
Ida Elizabeth:  Ignatius Press has a new edition of one of my favorite authors, Sigrid Undset, best known for her historical fiction trilogy Kristin Lavransdatter.  Ida Elizabeth is set in the 20thcentury, but still conveys Undset’s characteristic Catholic style and deep exploration of marriage and relationships.
Stealing Jenny (available as both an e-book and paperback) by award-winning author Ellen Gable is a well-paced and heart-pounding story with a very Catholic vision.  I could not stop reading Stealing Jenny on my Kindle App, neglecting household and family to find out what would happen.
Fiction for kids:
*Who can resist Christmas puns?  Not me.  An Angel Named Herald by local author Deacon Bruce Bradford is a charmingly goofy picture book with a sweet Christmas message.
*The brand-new Betsy-Tacy Treasury compiles in one handsome volume the first four classic  Betsy-Tacy books; they are like the Little House books, except set in early 1900s small-town Minnesota.  Tacy is a Catholic girl, and faith is a normal element of the girls’ lives.
*Ranger’s Apprentice fans rejoice, as author John Flanagan has begun a new series  set in the fictional lands of Araluen and Skandia —The Brotherband Chronicles.    Fans of adventure, friendship and fun will enjoy The Outsiders—first in this series about a group of  young sailors.
*For older readers (teens and up), The Song at the Scaffold by Gertrude von Le Fort, a classic recently reprinted, is a fictionalized account of the true martyrdom of a group of Carmelite sisters during the French “Reign of Terror
Non-fiction:
“A sad saint is a sorry saint, indeed,” goes the old expression.  Between Heaven and Mirth: Why Joy, Humor and Laughter Are at the Heart of the Spiritual Life by Father James Martin, S.J., explores how humor and laughter are not just add-ons, but vital, to healthy spirituality.  Like all Fr. Martin’s works, Mirth is easy to read without being “lite.” 
Surrender! The Life Changing Power of Doing God’s Will by Father Larry Richards, mentioned to me by several readers.  Fr. Richard challenges people to grow in the spiritual life  by putting God and His will first, always.
I love well-designed and written books that feel good to hold and read.  Generous Faith: Stories to Inspire Abundant Living by Sister Bridget Haase is handsomely formatted and sized.  In short, thoughtful stories, Sr. Bridget invites readers to have “generous faith” by living in the moment, accepting and trusting in divine care, and experiencing God’s presence in our daily lives. 
Welcome Baby Jesus! Advent and Christmas Reflections for Families by Sarah Reinhard is a gentle, easy read to help families “appreciate Advent” and the Christmas season through Scripture, reflections and action ideas.

Advent Book Giveaway #3: Olivia’s Gift

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Third book in the Advent Book Giveaway is Olivia’s Gift by Nancy Carabio Belanger.  Olivia’s Gift was one of the highlights of my December 2010 Christmas gift books column in the Catholic Post.

This book is a great read for girls especially in the 5th to 8th grade range.  As I wrote previously:  “Olivia’s Gift follows Olivia in her summer before 7th grade, navigating friends, family and trying (and not always succeeding) to live out St. Therese’s “Little Way.”  There’s a very powerful, but sensitively handled, pro-life theme here. The book is a sequel to the wonderful Olivia and the Little Way, that chronicles Olivia’s fifth grade year and her ups & downs.  The books can be read independently of each other, but most girls will want to read both once they’ve read one.”

I’m embarrassed to say that Nancy sent me a copy of the novel last year for a giveaway, and I had all planned to give away a copy of the book back then.  But if I remember correctly, a bout of the flu took me out for quite a bit of that season, and I couldn’t manage all I had intended for the blog.   Month after month I kept thinking I would manage a giveaway of Olivia’s Gift sometime during the year, but it didn’t happen until now.  But truly, it would be a great Christmas gift for a young girl in your life.

Here are the rules for this giveaway and all the books in the giveaway.  You must comment on the blog post or posts giving away the book.  So, if you are interested in Olivia’s Gift, leave a comment here on this post.

In addition, if you are the winner, I will let you know via comment if I do not have an e-mail or a way to reach you.  If you do not respond in two days, I’ll pull another name.  That’s it!  Couldn’t be easier.

If you are not a winner in this giveaway, I notice that Harvey House publishing, publisher of Olivia’s Gift, has a free shipping offer for books ordered before December 16, so do take advantage of that special offer.

Deadline for this giveaway is Sunday, December 4, at 7 p.m. Central Time.

Advent Book Giveaway #2: Mother Teresa and Me

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Second in my Advent book giveaway is Donna Marie Cooper O’Boyle’s Mother Teresa and Me.  I reviewed this book in my October Post column, and enjoyed so many things about it, chief among them the concept Mother Teresa actually used of “express novenas,” in which she would pray a Memorare 9 times in a row for a specific intention.    I’ve actually put the Memorare up on a bathroom mirror in our house just to help me remember this great little prayer idea.

This book would make a great gift.  It’s a nice light read.

As I mentioned when I started the Advent book giveaways, the rules are simple:  to be entered in this giveaway, just leave a comment on any post giving away a specific book.  So for winning a copy of Mother Teresa and Me, just leave a comment here.  If I don’t have a way to reach you, I will notify you via the comments, but if you don’t respond in a timely way (two days), I will pull another name.  Easy!

This giveaway opportunity ends at 7 p.m. central time Thursday, December 1.  Good luck to all the readers out there.