Some concepts, good or bad, are timeless. More than two millennia ago, Sophocles wrote in the Greek tragedy, Antigone, “No one loves the messenger who brings bad news.”
Today, we know that as the phrase “don’t shoot the messenger,” but in reality, it’s much easier and far more common to “shoot” the messenger than to work against this natural inclination.
Part of the human condition has been to recoil against not just bad or ugly news, but the person who brings the news. This can be small, as in half-jokingly cursing the people behind those calorie counts on menus at your favorite restaurants. Not that I have any experience with that.
But it can also loom large, and impair our ability to see a situation clearly.
Here’s one example:
I was with a group of young people at the 40 Days for Life last year in October to witness outside the local abortion clinic. Several of the teens felt deeply uncomfortable because another person was holding a sign with a photo of an aborted child. (the person was not with the 40 Days for Life, which forbids such images in its prayerful witness to life). I understand that discomfort, and share in it. A graphic photo held up in such a circumstance hurts the cause of life rather than helps it.
At the same time, I felt the need to point out gently, “But she is against what she is showing, and she didn’t create this reality. An abortion clinic did.”
We might be thinking, “Ugh. Why do we have to focus on this?”
Here’s why: to understand our need to work to end abortion, not just for the unborn children whose lives are ended, not just for the women hurt, but for those workers at all levels involved in this industry.
The Walls Are Talking by Abby Johnson with Kristin Detrow is actually a pretty short read. It’s the story of 17 former abortion workers and what they experienced, and how they found a path towards healing, in leaving that work. It has graphic content, as you might imagine, but it’s not overly so, and overall it’s more about the workers, and how their lives and perspectives changed.
Three common elements that ran through many of the stories stand out:
*the devastation of the products of conception (POC) lab. All abortion clinics have a POC lab, where it is the job of the technicians to piece back together the parts of the baby. This is to ensure that a woman will not have after-abortion complications such as infection if there are any human limbs or other body parts left behind. Just hearing about how routine it was, and how abortion workers found ways to live with it, is heart-wrenching.
*coping strategies: abortion clinic workers have adopted strategies to avoid the reality of what they are doing. There is an obvious cognitive dissonance between sincerely wanting to help women, which is how many workers get into the abortion industry, and also actively participating in the death of human life. Abortion workers can shield patients, but they are forced to confront the reality of abortion themselves on a regular basis.
*advice for those involved in pro-life work. Some of the clinic workers give genuinely helpful advice for those who work in the pro-life movement about what to say and do, and more importantly, what not to say or do, to help change hearts.
Abortion is a great and terrible evil.
The people who are involved in this industry are not evil.
They may be broken, blinded, and far from truth and love, despite their sincerely held beliefs. All the more reason they need our prayers rather than our condemnation, and our sacrifices rather than our shouting.
Reading The Walls Are Talking helps people understand the depth of the evil that is abortion, and some ideas about how specifically to pray for and reach those in this industry.
As St. Paul said in Galatians 6:9, “Let us not be weary in doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up.”
It’s so, so easy to give up, and to forget the important work that is involved in ending abortion. Let us not grow weary.
Yet what’s most compelling about Mother Teresa is not the words that she spoke, but the way she lived her life in service to the poorest of the poor.
So why read a book about her life? Two reasons: one, to understand the context in which she lived her vocation and her love of Jesus, as well as the Gospel message, and two, to be inspired to live that out in some way in our own lives.Mother Teresa in many ways symbolizes the works of mercy, and so it’s particularly appropriate that she is being canonized towards the end of this Jubilee Year of Mercy.
An important new book stresses this mercy perspective in her life.
As Fr. Kolodiejchuk, the postulator for the cause of her canonization, writes in the introduction: “In Mother Teresa ‘s life, as in the lives of many saints, we are offered a lived theology.”
This “lived theology” is evident in A Call to Mercy, as each of the 14 chapters is titled with the work of mercy, both corporal and spiritual.For each work of mercy, the chapter offers five elements: a short introduction of how Mother Teresa lived the work; a section of “her words,” including excerpts from speeches, letters, and interviews; “her example: the testimonies” with numerous quotes from those who were involved in her work, from fellow Missionaries of Charity and others; a reflection for personal use; and a prayer, which are chosen from prayers that Mother Teresahad a devotion to or herself wrote.
A Call to Mercy is a treasure for any reader who would like to understand Mother Teresa and her work better, as well as contemplate her life and the ways in which an “average person” can live those out.It’s also an excellent way to continue a focus on mercy as the Jubilee Year of Mercy enters its final months.
I have enjoyed and read many other books by Mother Teresa and about her, and I could fill a year of columns with excellent sources.
But to celebrate her canonization this month, I recommend three other works that capture her life, her personality, and her spirituality in total.
First is the award-winning 1986 Mother Teresa, the finest documentary or video of any kind about Mother’s life or work.It was produced by sisters Ann and Jeannette Petrie, and has never been equalled for impact or beauty.
Second is the coffee-table book, Works of Love are Works of Peace, by photographer Michael Collopy. The 1996 book has been recently republished in an affordable softcover, and contains dozens of luminous photos of Mother Teresa, her homes around the world, and the people she and her community serve.
Third is the small volume by British writer Malcolm Muggeridge, Something Beautiful for God.It is a beautifully written and captivating portrait of Mother Teresa’s life, as well as Malcolm Muggeridge’s own faith journey as a recent Christian. When he wrote the book in 1971, he was not yet Catholic, but a recent Christian, having lived most of his life as an agnostic.The shortness of the book and simple vignettes of her life make it a classic.
In the category of “better late than never,” I’m sharing some great reads to consider reading or re-reading to get and stay in the spirit of World Youth Day, especially for those of us watching from afar.
“He was a moral reference point for his friends and did not hesitate to be a challenging counselor and confessor. But the pastoral stress … was always on personal responsibility. He was not the decider for his friends; they must be their own deciders, he insisted, if they were to be true to the moral dignity built into them as human persons and as Christians. “
“(Fr. Wojtyla was), according to one of his friends and penitents, uninterested in the ‘mass production of Christians’ in a confessional assembly line, but deeply committed to accompanying a fellow believer in his or her quest for the truth, including the truth of failure and the truth about making wise decisions. Yet Wojtyla, the confessor who gently prodded good decisions, never imposed decisions. ‘You must decide’ was his signature phrase in spiritual direction. One couldn’t opt out of the drama of life in the gap. One had to decide–and, with the grace of God and the support of the Church, wise and true decisions could be made.”
George Weigel wrote City of Saints, but he’s known best for writing the definitive biography of John Paul II, Witness to Hope. This is a long book, but so worth reading. A classic.
I’ve written about Jason Evert’s book, Saint John Paul the Great: His Five Loves before, but I’ll reiterate that this book is highly readable and fascinating account. I mean this as a compliment, but it’s like a lighter version of Witness to Hope. Many pilgrims to World Youth Day will be visiting Divine Mercy sites related to St. Faustina. Divine Mercy for Moms is an engaging introduction to the saint and the devotion.
I have many more books to add, including my favorite poetry books by John Paul II, but this post has been in draft long enough!
What would you recommend people read to celebrate World Youth Day 2016?
Following is my July book review column that appears in this weekend’s print edition of The Catholic Post.
To be honest, I sometimes get irritated at the topics or titles of books because of the potential hubris involved.
“The Best and Only Diet for Everyone. “The One Fool-Proof Way to Get Your Baby to Sleep.” “Have a Perfectly Organized House in 3 Hours or Less.” These aren’t real book titles, but could be, because we all recognize something similar in books or articles out there.
Maybe that’s because the more I live, the less convinced I am that there is ONE WAY to do any one thing. Think you have it all figured out? You probably don’t. Even if an author has expertise in a field, the most effective books will inspire people with gentle guidance and information, and encourage people.
That’s why I appreciate three newer books that offer a tremendous amount of sensible advice and encouragement for three stages of life—wedding, childbirth, and child-raising— with none of the guilt or stress that can vex readers. If you’re in one of these stages of life, or know someone who is, these books are first-rate.
Like many women, I have always enjoyed bridal magazines and seeing the fun crafts, food, and other details that go into wedding planning.
The first half of Invited focuses on the practical, complete with checklists for budgeting, other marriage prep and ideas, the Mass, and the reception. The latter chapters are a very gentle, very well-put, explanation of Catholic teaching on various areas related to marriage and the wedding, from “holding on to your sanity” to starting your life together.
Particularly strong were the chapters on beauty, inspiring women to have a healthy sense of beauty without going overboard or playing the “comparison game” too much; and what Calis terms “the sex chapter,” a sensitive and thorough explanation,rooted in the Theology of the Body, of Catholic teaching on sexuality. Calis’ husband Andrew writes periodic “from the groom” sections providing a male view of things.
Each chapter ends with a “for conversation” paragraph meant to spark healthy discussion between bride & groom.
Invited would make an excellent gift for a recently engaged couple.
Theologian and mother of five Windley-Daoust has written a personal, Catholic, and realistic look at the process of birthing, both normal and not-so-normal circumstances. Her writing style is theological, but with a mother’s heart. She shares some of her own birth stories, as well as those of many others. The book is suffused with the spiritual as well as physical, emotional, and practical aspects of childbirth.
Though the title may make it seem like it’s for the title, it’s not just for pregnant moms or moms of young ones.
I thought I would be less interested or affected by this book, since it’s been more than a decade since I have had a baby. But I found as I read that it was both lovely and healing to reflect back in a spiritual way, my own experiences of giving birth. The Gift of Birth offers space for moms to reflect and consider the awesome things, the good things and the less-than-great things that happen during pregnancy and childbirth.
The Gift of Birth spans four sections: “The Theology of the Body and Childbirth,” “Reading the Signs of Birth,” “When Childbearing is Difficult, Where is God?”, and “Seeking the Holy Spirit in Birth Stories.” It’s hard to pick a favorite section, but the chapters of “Reading the Signs of Birth” follow the progression of labor and birth, and the spiritual meaning present. The range of birth stories shared in “Seeking the Holy Spirit in Birth Stories” is both fascinating and prayerful as eight women reflect on giving birth in their own lives.
Obviously, a book like The Gift of Birthwould be ideal for an expectant mom, but would also be excellent for women of any age.
Once-local author Marc Cardaronella, who previously worked in evangelization in the diocese of Peoria, has written a remarkable new book called, Keep Your Kids Catholic: Sharing Your Faith and Making It Stick. [Cardaronella is now director of the Bishop Helmsing Institute for Faith Formation at the Diocese of Kansas City–St. Joseph, Missouri.]
The title of Keep Your Kids Catholic gave me the most worry, since any kind of parenting book or advice always strikes fear and sometimes amusement into the heart of many parents, myself included. Perhaps it’s because I, like so many others before me, vowed when I didn’t have kids that I would parent differently (and so much better) than all the parents I saw around me. You know, the statements like “my child will never eat candy before lunch” or “my children will never interrupt two grown-ups having a conversation.” Etc. And then you laugh at your younger self.
Keep Your Kids Catholic is by no means one of that kind of book. It could be titled, Keep Yourself Catholic more than anything else, since Cardaronella stresses the importance of personal witness and a vibrant Catholic home environment as being vital to fostering faith among young people.
The book is divided into four sections, all leading towards encouraging young people to explicitly embrace the Catholic Faith as their own: “How Does Faith Work?”, “Is Your Own Faith Secure?”, “What Kind of an Education Fosters Faith?” and “How Do You Create An Environment of Faith?”
Cardaronella emphasizes two interconnected goals: one, as a parent, having a rich faith and prayer life; and two, having a strong relationship with your children, especially as they grow older. Those two features are also key for a healthy family atmosphere. He also covers the importance of strong mentoring relationships with others in teen and young adulthood years and having healthy relationships with a Catholic community in one’s parish, among families, and among children themselves. The maxim, “It takes a village,” is certainly relevant here.
Cardaronella combines his own story of reversion to the Catholic faith along with what he’s learned as a parent and catechist. He admits he is not an expert in child-raising, but Keep Your Kids Catholic provides ample good advice and information for parents everywhere.
I am still processing the wonderful Finding Your Fiat Conference I attended last weekend here in central Illinois. So many great memories and take-aways. Before I get to my promised talk notes, here are a few highlights of “Finding Your Fiat” from me:
*Friday night gathering: a mini-concert and then Karaoke with Marie Miller. I didn’t actually do Karaoke but I loved getting to sing and dance along. So many ladies ( Bonnie and Nell and so many others) did really funny and great songs. Now I want to somehow do karaoke with the family or friends. Is there an app or inexpensive way to get started with this?
*Saturday’s program: so many awesome women, so many adorable babies, praise and worship with Marie Miller, and more. The coloring pages provided by Katie Bogner, were lovely and relaxing as we began the day. Katie also hand-stamped sweet charms with the word “Fiat” on them. I wrote down tons of quotes from Colleen Mitchell and Meg Hunter-Kilmer and Jenna Guizar. I wish I could have heard the talks by Annie Tillberg and Laura Fanucci, but I was listening to a different talk during the former and giving my talk during the latter. I was super grateful that Mary Lenaburg agreed to come up towards the end of my talk and share some of her wisdom about finding time for life-giving pursuits even while processing grief and life changes.
So without further ado, here are notes from my talk, entitled:
“Shine like lights in the world,
as you hold on to the word of life.” —Philippians 2:15-16
“So then, my beloved obedient as you have always been, not only when I am present all the more now when I am absent, work out your salvation with fear and trembling. For God is the one who, for his good purpose, works in you both to dear and to work.
Do everything without grumbling or questioning, that you may be blameless and innocent, children of God without blemish in the midst of a crooked and perverse generation, among who you shine like lights in the world, as you hold on to the word of life, so that my boast for the day of Christ may be that I did not run in vain or labor in vain.”
Hebrew scribe, 90 years old, martyred in Maccabees persecution
“But making a high resolve, worthy of his years and the dignity of his old age and the gray hairs that he had reached with distinction and his excellent life even from childhood, and moreover according to the holy God-given law, he declared himself quickly, telling them to send him to Hades.
“Such pretense is not worthy of our time of life,” he said, “for many of the young might suppose that Eleazar in his ninetieth year had gone over to an alien religion, and through my pretense, for the sake of living a brief moment longer, they would be led astray because of me, while I defile and disgrace my old age. Even if for the present I would avoid the punishment of mortals, yet whether I live or die I will not escape the hands of the Almighty. Therefore, by bravely giving up my life now, I will show myself worthy of my old age and leave to the young a noble example of how to die a good deathwillingly and nobly for the revered and holy laws.” –2 Maccabees 6:23-28
(worth reading the whole chapter and 2 Maccabees 7, the martyrdom of mother and seven sons, and she died after all her sons).
a notebook/scrapbook combination, a way for a learned person, scholar, or writer to keep random bits of information in one place.
have existed in that name since the 17th century, but even beforehand in works like the Notebooks of Leonardo DaVinci.
So, Eleazar’s Commonplace Book: random quotes and pieces of books from one who wants to be “worthy of her years and gray hair” to help you consider ways to “shine like lights” throughout life, and be able to persevere (“hold on to the word of life” and not “run in vain”).
BLESSED ARE THE PURE IN HEART, FOR THEY SHALL SEE GOD
St. Gregory of Nyssa on the Beatitudes
“Bodily health is a good thing, but what is truly blessed is not only to know how to keep one’s health but actually to be healthy. If someone praises health but then goes and eats food that makes him ill, what is the use to him, in his illness, of all his praise of health?
“We need to look at the text we are considering in just the same way. It does not say that it is blessed to know something about the Lord God, but that it is blessed to have God within oneself. Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God.
I do not think that this is simply intended to promise a direct vision of God if one purifies one’s soul. On the other hand, perhaps the magnificence of this saying is hinting at the same thing that is said more clearly to another audience: The kingdom of God is within you. That is, we are to understand that when we have purged our souls of every illusion and every disordered affection, we will see our own beauty as an image of the divine nature.”
“He was a moral reference point for his friends and did not hesitate to be a challenging counselor and confessor. But the pastoral stress … was always on personal responsibility. He was not the decider for his friends; they must be their own deciders, he insisted, if they were to be true to the moral dignity built into them as human persons and as Christians. “
later in the book:
“(Fr. Wojtyla was), according to one of his friends and penitents, uninterested in the ‘mass production of Christians’ in a confessional assembly line, but deeply committed to accompanying a fellow believer in his or her quest for the truth, including the truth of failure and the truth about making wise decisions. Yet Wojtyla, the confessor who gently prodded good decisions, never imposed decisions. ‘You must decide’was his signature phrase in spiritual direction. One couldn’t opt out of the drama of life in the gap. One had to decide–and, with the grace of God and the support of the Church, wise and true decisions could be made.”
QUESTION: How can you be a decider? How can you be a good decider, filled with personal responsibility?
WIN HAPPINESS Rilla of Inglesideby Lucy Maud Montgomery (writer of the Anne of Green Gables books). I dearly love all of the Anne books, and this is the last in the series about her family, and about Anne & Gilbert’s youngest child, darling, charming and growing-up Rilla (named after Marilla). Rilla of Ingleside is such a good book as a coming-of-age story, but also great historical fiction about WWI written close to the time. Noble and heartbreaking without being completely depressing, as a lot of fiction about WWI is, and rightfully so, since it’s the first modern war.
At one point, Rilla is bemoaning in a conversation with her brother Walter how the war is changing their whole community and family. Her brother Walter says:
“Now we won’t be sober any more. We’ll look beyond the years—to the time when the war will be over and Jem and Jerry and I will come marching home and we’ll all be happy again.”
“We won’t be—happy—in the same way,” said Rilla.
“No, not in the same way. Nobody whom this war has touched will ever be happy again in quite the same way. But it will be a better happiness, I think, little sister—a happiness we’ve earned. We were very happy before the war, weren’t we? With a home like Ingleside, and a father and mother like ours we couldn’t help being happy. But that happiness was a gift from life and love; it wasn’t really ours—life could take it back at any time. It can never take away the happiness we win for ourselves in the way of duty.”
QUESTION: What kind of happiness have you won in the way of duty?
Set in early 20th century Minnesota, Emily of Deep Valley by Maud Hart Lovelace, author of the iconic Betsy-Tacy books, is a coming-of-age story about a high school graduate, Emily, who can’t go away to college like her cousin and friends since she is taking care of the elderly grandfather who raised her. At first, she wallows in pity.
“Depression settled down upon her, and although she tried to brush it away it thickened like a fog. “Why, the kids will be home for Thanksgiving! That will be here in no time. I mustn’t get this way,” she thought. But she felt lonely and deserted and futile. “A mood like this has to be fought. It’s like an enemy with a gun,” she told herself. But she couldn’t seem to find a gun with which to fight.
Later, she learns to “muster her wits” and she starts a reading group, and goes out to dances, and becomes active in helping Syrian immigrants. She discovers a quote in Shakespeare:
“Muster your wits: stand in your own defense.” She had no idea in what sense he had used it, but it seemed to be a message aimed directly at her. “Muster your wits: stand in your own defense,” she kept repeating to herself on the long walk home. After dinner she sat down in her rocker, looked out at the snow and proceeded to muster her wits. “I’m going to fill my winter and I’m going to fill it with something worth while,” she resolved.
QUESTION: How Can you Muster Your Wits? What are your Resources for Doing that? (friends, faith, outside help)
EMBRACE YOUR GOOFY HOBBIES
C.S. Lewis’ The Screwtape Letters is a series of imaginary letters from a senior demon “(Screwtape) to his nephew about ways to ensnare a young man in WWII-era England. It’s a classic on the spiritual life and growth in holiness, both funny and spiritually insightful. All the terms and suggestions are backward (the Enemy is God).
“The deepest likings and impulses of any man are the raw material, the starting-point, with which the Enemy has furnished him. To get him away from those is therefore always a point gained; even in things indifferent it is always desirable to substitute the standards of the World, or convention, or fashion, for a human’s own real likings and dislikings. I myself would carry this very far. I would make it a rule to eradicate from my patient any strong personal taste which is not actually a sin, even if it is something quite trivial such as a fondness for county cricket or collecting stamps or drinking cocoa. Such things, I grant you, have nothing of virtue in them; but there is a sort of innocence and humility and self-forgetfulness about them which I distrust. The man who truly and disinterestedly enjoys any one thing in the world, for its own sake, and without caring two-pence what other people say about it, is by that very fact forearmed against some of our subtlest modes of attack. You should always try to make the patient abandon the people or food or books he really likes in favour of the ‘best’ people, the ‘right’ food, the ‘important’ books. I have known a human defended from strong temptations to social ambition by a still stronger taste for tripe and onions.”
“There is an Indian proverb that says that everyone is a house with four rooms, a physical, a mental, an emotional, and a spiritual . Most of us tend to live in one room most of the time but unless we go into every room every day, even if only to keep it aired, we are not a complete person.”
Question: How can you air out those four rooms each day, or even each week?What can you do to be well-rounded?
RESOLUTION:How can you make time for something you “want” to do, not “have” to do?
Daily Mass–more when kids were tiny, less when kids were busy
QUESTION: What “want-tos” are you going to make intentional over the next few weeks?
I would love to hear what want-tos are in your line-up the next few weeks. If you attended “Finding Your Fiat,” I’d also love to hear your favorite parts and things you are pondering.
As a sharing of one of my “want-tos,” here is my completed New York Time mini-crossword for Wednesday (BTW, I didn’t do it in 35 seconds! I did it late last night, as I mentioned in my talk, and forgot to take a screen shot, so I did it again this morning. But many times I do get it in under a minute.):
The ancient Christian expression, “the blood of the martyrs is the seed of the Church,” is commonly known. We as American Christians may think of it as an encouraging or awe-inspiring reminder of the courage of martyrs, often in centuries past, and how their witness inspired others and us to live our faith today.But I think few of us realize the extent to which our brothers and sisters are persecuted right now, throughout the world, for the faith we share.
The book is divided into three sections: anti-Christian persecution around the world; myths about the global war on Christians; and fallout, consequences, and response.Allen proves that anti-Christian persecution is undeniable. He also shows how the term “war” is not hyperbole in describing this problem.He also shares some of the myths surrounding the victimization of Christians, importantly sharing what’s true and what is not, to help put things in a realistic context.
John Allen, who is a prolific author on all things Catholic, and editor of the Catholic news website cruxnow.com, has a unique perspective. He is himself Catholic, so he has an insider’s view of things. He has a keen sense of how Catholicism interacts with the world culture at large, and so he can and does write about it fairly and comprehensively.He’s written about so many Catholic issues, from papal elections to scandals, from Church politics to theology.
Reading John Allen on any topic can sometimes seen overwhelming, so thorough is he to cover all aspects.And in a book about Christian persecution and martyrdom, that can be even more daunting. But it’s both sobering and uplifting to have such a well-roundedpicture of what millions of Christians of the rest of the world experiences.
The Global War on Christians is a 2016 edition of a book originally published in 2013.It’s been updated because in just those three short years, the notion of Christian persecution has become a settled fact, rather than a “stretch” by those of us in the West.That’s because of the dramatic stories from the Middle East, but Allen points out that the Middle East is not the only place where Christians are marginalized or martyred.
In this new edition, Allen shares even more stories and facts to reflect the most recent areas of concern.
Allen tells a ruefully funny story in The Global War on Christians.David Barrett, a pioneer of the study of Christian martyrdom before his death in 2011, spoke to a group of Christian business people.They asked him, “What is the single most effective form of evangelization?” He said that the evidence points to martyrdom as the most effective form of evangelization.
As Allen shares, “The response of the crowd quiet for a minute, until one of the industrialists finally had the nerve to ask, ‘Dr. Barrett, could you tell us what the second most effective form of evangelization is?’”
A highlight of Allen’s writing is how he is able to tell the stories of so many in a detailed, respectful way, so that the reader gets to know many individual stories, rather than the trends.For instance, he explains that one such person was known in his community as “a man of God, trusted by all” before his martyrdom.
“One spiritual fruit of the global war on Christians is providing the contemporary church with more such stories, both those told about the dead by others and those that survivors can tell for themselves,” Allen writes.
I confess that I found the book incredibly depressing at times, and wondered how in the world the average American Catholic can do anything at all about it.I also have a healthy dose of guilt pondering my relatively easy Catholic life in the West. That’s why Allen’s final chapter, “What’s to be Done,” is so powerful.It details the ways that a number of solutions, from prayer, global thinking, “micro-charity,” institutional humanitarian relief, political activism, and refugee resettling, can help to alleviate the sufferings of those most vulnerable to abuse.
There’s a new documentary about the writer and “farmer-philosopher” Wendell Berry and about his life-long advocacy for simple living.The film’s producer/director, Laura Dunn, talked with an interviewer about how making the film overwhelmed her about the state of the world, but Berry’s approach to life helped her reconcile it with her own life.You can read that interview here.
As Dunn shares in the interview, ”What he’s saying to me is, there is no big solution. It’s broken. We’re all complicit in a broken system, and it a broken world. The question isn’t how can I fix it all. But how can I, with my own two hands, do good work, every day. And I find that immensely hopeful.”
In the same way, we Catholics who feel overcome by the state of the world, the evil present, the enormity of what Christians in other places undergo, we can feel hopeless. But by making concrete actions, beginning with prayer, we can create change in the world, with our own two hands.
Following is my August column that appears on this month’s book page of the print edition of The Catholic Post.
The definition of a “trigger warning” is a statement before of some form of media so people can be aware that something distressing will be shown or discussed.
Consider yourself warned.
The other day, in the midst of one of the worst (so far) videos released on the Planned Parenthood outrages, a dear, wise friend shared on Facebook the William Wilberforce quote, “You may choose to look the other way, but you can never say again that you did not know.” So I shared it, too, and included her #DefundPP hashtag.
But within a few hours, I felt like I was not telling the truth.
Even seeing screenshots or reading brief descriptions of the subsequent, even more graphic, videos has been profoundly distressing. I have felt sad and helpless to act. I know I’m not alone.
I’m somewhat heartened by Cardinal Timothy Dolan’s comment about our natural horror at it proving, “that despite over forty years of legalized abortion, the human conscience has not been completely deadened.”
I recently heard a podcast interview with journalist Rukmini Callimachi, who covers Islamic terrorism for the New York Times. It’s her job to watch videos of beheadings and gruesome killings by terrorists that were all over the news and horrified the world last summer, but which are still happening, once every few days.
Callimachi shared that while she must watch the videos to write about terrorism, she looks away during the most graphic footage to “just see the edges of it” to lessen its effect on her psyche.
It’s not just okay, but often the healthiest response, that we “look away.” Setting boundaries on media consumption is a mark of maturity, not lack of toughness.
But that doesn’t mean we know or do nothing.
As I learn even from the “edges” of these graphic Planned Parenthood videos, my heart breaks not just for what’s going on. I also mourn for the women and girls who feel they have no choice but abortion, and for all those involved in the abortion industry.
First, let’s consider the women and girls affected by abortion.
No One Told Me I Could Cry by nurse and health educator Connie Corso Nykiel, is a revised and expanded update of her bestselling and groundbreaking work on healing after abortion.
In this 20th anniversary edition, the book has been updated to reflect the latest research on pregnancy and abortion; the increased support offered to young women, especially college students, to allow them to have children and continue education; and the wealth of resources and groups for women and families to grieve and heal after abortion.
No One Told Me I Could Cry is a sound, non-judgmental resource. It walks alongside women. It’s written expressly for “the young” going through the grieving process after abortion, but as the author describes, it can be for women, either recently or many decades later, who need healing and closure from the wound.
Next, let’s consider those in the abortion industry.
Trevino’s story explores how good people drift in our culture, and how the prayers and support of others can help them change paths.
Trevino’s encounters with various Catholic priests over the years was especially moving. One priest is curt, sharing Church teaching in a condemning way. Another time, at a turning point in her journey, a priest shares with her gently, “This isn’t going to be easy, and it might not happen right away…but it’s important for you to realize that where you work … is contrary to the will of God. In fact, by working there you’re putting your soul in danger.”
Reading books like UnPlanned and Redeemed by Grace inspires action, whether it’s prayer for the conversion and healing of those involved in the abortion industry, or providing support to groups like the charity And Then There Were None, which equips those leaving the abortion industry with material, spiritual, and practical assistance.
Praying for those affected by abortion is a vital work anyone can do. Venerable Fulton Sheen promoted the concept of “spiritual adoption” of the unborn. Another book takes it to the next level, and is relevant to praying for all those impacted by abortion.
Adoption Movement: Saving Souls by Esmerelda Kicsek is a brief and prayerful book about the importance of interceding for others. Kicsek makes the case that it’s good for us to spiritually “adopt” others persons and pray for them as we would close members of our family.
Adoption Movement explains of the concept of spiritual adoption through quotes and stories from the saints, Kicsek’s own story of being called to spiritually adopt, and numerous simple, doable ideas of how the reader can make spiritual adoption a part of one’s prayer practice.
For instance, Kicsek recounts the well-known story of St. Therese praying for the conversion of condemned criminal (who converted before his death) and who called him her “first born.” Kicsek also shares how the practice of spiritual adoption has been fruitful for her and others in ways beyond understanding.
Reading this book gave me many realistic and small ideas of how to spiritually adopt those affected by abortion.
God, who loves us more than we can imagine, despite anything we have done, wants us to be whole and well. He desires our human flourishing here on earth as well as in heaven. Part of bringing about the Kingdom of God here involves us sharing that message with those close to us.
Consider reading some of the books discussed here and then praying about ways you can offer hope and healing to others.
Following is my July column that appears on this month’s book page of the print edition of The Catholic Post.
Full disclosure: I sometimes disparage younger authors. You know, the ones writing memoirs at 15 or how-to-parent books at 25. It may be a kind of reverse ageism, but the older I get, the more I see that wisdom often comes with age.
But it’s also true that generalizations are dangerous and unhelpful, especially when I recall so many exceptions to the rule, such as Colleen Swaim’s excellent books for young people, or Elizabeth Esther’s searing memoir Girl at the End of the World, to name just two.
And then I realized that a number of new recent books, all by young authors, are excellent, each in their own way. See? Even middle-aged and older people can change their views, and—I say only partly joking— there can be harmony among the generations.
Libresco is an accomplished writer and popular blogger at Patheos, a religious blog portal. She grew up in an atheist home, but during her time as an undergrad at Yale (just a few short years ago) she encountered intelligent, thoughtful Christians unafraid of intellectual rigor applied to faith.
Eventually, she converted to Catholicism and blogged her journey in real-time. This book recounts part of that improbable, highly intellectual, and spiritual journey.
But far more than a personal journey memoir, Arriving at Amen is a thoughtful book on seven of the basic elements of a healthy Catholic life: Petition, Confession, Examen, the Divine Office, Lectio Divina, and the Mass. The book shares, in-depth, how these nourish and inspire a robust faith and life.
For such a recent convert, and young writer, Libresco writes with a mature spirituality that is enlightening to readers of all ages.
Spenceley is a young but experienced journalist, so the writing is keen and clear. Like Arriving at Amen, Chastity is for Lovers is part personal story, but more an attentive analysis of what’s great about our Catholic faith; in this case, on what makes for healthy sexuality.
Spenceley sets out the argument for chastity as the healthiest, most integrative way of life, no matter one’s state in life. She explores, with humor and grace, how it can be a challenge in our culture, but so worthwhile.
There are many good things about Chastity is for Lovers, but the best chapter is Spenceley’s sharp critique the “purity culture” promoted in some Protestant churches, and how it can harm young people and impair healthy sexual development. “Purity culture” involves, at its worst, shame-based and condemning messages about premarital sex in a misguided effort to promote purity, but often having the result of creating unhealthy sexual messages and lead people away from the truth, rather than towards it.
Spenceley shares throughout her book how the Catholic vision of chastity is so very different from that, and how vital it is to convey that message to young people.
Decent Exposure, by actress and designer Jessica Rey, and former model Leah Darrow, is a very different book than the previous two, but has its place here. This is especially true since this kind of book is probably best created by young authors.
A line from the book sums up the authors’ well-met aim: “Decent Exposurewas written with the simple idea that women need positive, uplifting guidance. It is not about shame; it is about empowerment.”
The book is a well-designed large volume, with engaging graphic design and appealing photos. This book is a great conversation starter for pre-teen, teen, and older girls on up about body image, beauty, relationships, and mostly, living in our culture without being overwhelmed by it.
Decent Exposure is not a perfect book, and some topics are worded differently than I might express them, but it’s a sensible resource for ideas to start or continue a healthy dialogue with the girls in your life.
Following is my January column, that appears in this weekend’s print edition of The Catholic Post.
You probably know this old chestnut–a man prayed faithfully every day for years: “Lord, please let me win the lottery.” Finally, after 10 years of petition, God answers the man: “Meet me halfway–buy a ticket.”
I’ll avoid commenting on whether “win the lottery” is a good prayer petition, except to say that the right number of lottery tickets to buy is one, every once in a while.Even God (well, the God of this joke) agrees.
The reason that joke has longevity is that it’s so true, especially at this time of year when making resolutions.
We want to eat healthier, but don’t put away the leftover Christmas chocolate. I’m using the royal “we” here, as I’m currently guilty of that one.
We want to start an exercise routine, but don’t plan out when we’d get to the gym or go for a walk.
We say we’ll get more organized, but spend more time on Pinterest pinning gorgeously organized spaces, than actually cleaning out the closet.
Even in the spiritual life, we might desire to grow in faith, but don’t take the practical steps needed.We need to recommit to meeting God “half-way” by doing what we can to cooperate with grace.
Because I’m a goals and resolutions type of person, I love this approach.So following is a newly-released book paired with each of the SMART principles.
First is specific—so let’s tackle a specific, and often controversial, topic: contraception.
Angela Franks, PhD, has written Contraception and Catholicism: What the Church Teaches and Why a helpful, easy-to-read guide that covers the personal, the practical, and the nitty-gritty about openness to life.Dr. Franks calls herself a “theologian mom,” so she manages to be intellectual and down-to-earth, and funny, as she shares the Catholic Church’s teaching in this area, and what it means for couples and families.
Next is measurable—and what better than a book about science?
Brother Consolmagno and Father Mueller are both Jesuits who are work at the Vatican Observatory, one of the world’s leading research facilities, and they write about “what its like when science encounters faith on friendly, mutual respectful terms . …for people who want to take (both) science and faith seriously.”
Would You Baptize an Extraterrestrial? points out, “Science isn’t a big book of facts. It’s a conversation.”
So the two authors have an actual, back-and-forth conversation throughout the book explaining and learning together about various topics, from Galileo to the star of Bethlehem to the end of the world.The conversation format allows the authors to cover complex topics without overwhelming readers.
As Father Mueller writes, “We don’t claim to be able to teach you, ‘How to’ do it.Instead, we simply want to share with you the joy and hope—and fun—that we find in doing science and living faith.”
Well said, and well-written.
Next for goal- setting is attainable.How about working to achieve a real trust in God?
Zimak writes from first-person perspective, since he has struggled with anxiety and depression for most of his life. From Fear to Faith is a book-length explanation of the main talk he gives in his work as a Catholic evangelist.
What I love most about the book is that Zimak doesn’t downplay— at all — the importance of getting professional help for mental health issues, whether that includes counseling, medication, or many other ways.But he’s not providing those in “From Fear to Faith,” but enriching them. by offering simple and effective spiritual strategies—a way one can follow Jesus at His word and “be not afraid.”
Next is relevant — having a goal that is personally meaningful, like sharing the faith with loved ones.
I can hardly believe it, but I’ve never reviewed a book by the excellent and prolific Scott Hahn.Knowing I will date myself, let me share that I recall listening to a Scott Hahn cassette tape in the late 1980s, and it has always stayed with me.
As Hahn writes, “You can’t keep the Faith unless you give it away,” and this book offers personal stories, background of church history of how Catholics have shared the faith, and practical advice about how and why to “do evangelization.” It’s an encouraging read that is informative and inspiring.
Finally, goals should be time-bound.What better than a daybook, which promotes a small amount of reading each day?
Each month offers a specific theme, such as peace in January and service to the poor in September.Each day has a quote from Francis or early writings about him, then “Life as Francis Did” applying it to today, and then “Growing with Francis,” with a very specific, and very do-able, action item.
This book is like a “who’s who” of Catholicism, from mini-biographies of saints and blessed, the famous and the obscure, in fascinating color. Each chapter is a little gem of anecdotes and memories of the particular fellow “traveler,” from Cardinal Cooke to Groeschel’s secretary.
The prolific Fr. Groeschel is easy to read (in the best sense of the word); he’s such an excellent writer that he makes it look easy to write in a conversational, relational style. Travelers Along the Way puts that great style to good use, as you can easily pick up and read one “traveler’s” story. The Saints in My Life: My Favorite Spiritual Companionsis very similar to Travelers Along the Way, but instead of stories of people Fr. Groeschel knew, the stories here are about his spiritual friendship with saints over his life and vocation. Nicely organized and useful for considering how the reader is impacted by saints.
Finally, here is a book I couldn’t locate on my bookshelf–I must have loaned it out to someone. But even thinking about this book again brings up strong emotions.
In , A Priest Forever: The Life of Eugene Hamilton, Father Groeschel writes so beautifully about the life of a young man who had a longtime vocation to the priesthood. From the description (since I can’t peruse the book, nor can I find where I’ve written about it before–it must be offline):
This is the true story of Eugene Hamilton, a young man who dreamed of becoming a priest; a young man stricken with terminal cancer as his life was just beginning; a man who was ordained, by papal dispensation, just hours before he died.
My memory of reading it: I was a new mother with one baby when I first read this book. I found myself weeping about his death, but also deepening my sense of by the nature of vocation, the gift of the priesthood to the rest of the people of God, and the beauty of life and death.
Do you have a favorite Father Groeschel book? Any impressions of his life or advice?